Friday, June 28, 2013

Republican Jackass of the Week

Little-known Kansas representative Tim Huelskamp (R).

As you know, on Wednesday the Supreme Court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act, forcing the federal government to recognize legally married same sex couples, and provide to them the same thousand rights that are bestowed upon opposite sex married couples. In essence, it said that treating some legally married couples differently from others is discriminatory and unconstitutional.

As most polls show, the majority of Americans approve of same sex marriage, and strongly disagree with Regressive republicans on all social issues that discriminate against women, Hispanics, blacks, the LGBT community, etc.

Enter Little Timmy Huelskamp.

He and other far rightwing House Regressives want to immediately begin attempts to revive the Federal Marriage Amendment in the next few days. This would amend the US Constitution to make same sex marriage illegal.

Would you believe that?

Considering this group of rightwing nutjobs, I'd have to say yes. Doesn't surprise me. An amendment to ban gay marriage right on the heels of the Supreme Court granting equal rights to same sex couples -- how typical. And how out of touch, as usual.

I thought after the Official Regressive Republican Autopsy a few months ago, these fringe lunatics vowed to steer clear of making idiotic, scientifically bizarre abortion statements, stop attacking gays and lesbians, end their War on Women, and get on track with immigration reform so as to stop alienating Hispanics in America.

How silly of me.

Of course a Constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage probably won't pass even John Boner's uncontrollable House; it definitely won't pass the Senate and you can bet the house on the fact that President Obama won't sign it. It's just another fundraising scheme.

What a waste of time. Hey, shouldn't you Regressives be doing something useful? Like pretending to repeal Obamacare for the 38th time?

Timmy Huelskamp, our Republican Jackass of the Week. Congrats.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Supreme Court Gets Two Right, One Wrong

Sun rising over the Supreme Court
Great news!

The Supreme Court ruled this morning that the so-called Defense of Marriage Act is unconstitutional. DOMA denied federal benefits to same sex married couples. The high court established that this law "singles out a class of persons deemed by a state entitled to recognition and protection to enhance their own liberty."

Simple enough. The Justice Department had already stopped upholding this anti-gay, discriminatory law and now it's been struck down.

You cannot give benefits and rights to one group of married people in this country while denying the same benefits and rights to another group of married, tax-paying Americans.

Justice Anthony Kennedy, writing for the majority, said that the federal law, passed by Congress in 1996, violates the US Constitution's guarantee of equal protection.

This does not mean that all 50 states must now enact marriage equality laws. But it does ensure that same sex couples who are legally married in any US state must receive equal treatment under federal law, including over 1,000 benefits that other married couples receive, with tax benefits and Social Security benefits among the two biggest.

So, for example, a same sex couple who is legally married in, say, Massachusetts, does not necessarily have to be recognized in a far rightwing, backward, yahoo state like Texas, Oklahoma or Mississippi. But it does have to recognized and granted all rights by the federal government.

Children of same sex married couples will now know that their families are as valid as any other.

Right now, about a third of all US states recognize same sex marriage. Before long, that will be the case in all 50 states. They're falling like dominoes.

The second ruling the Supreme Court got right dealt with California's Proposition 8, which prohibited same sex marriage in California, and was already struck down by a federal district court. The Supreme Court decided proponents "did not have standing" to put it back into effect.

Simply put, the Supreme Court said the anti-gay bigots could not show that a married lesbian couple down the street could possibly harm their own marriage in any way. Thus they had no "standing" to put the discriminatory law back into effect.

So two big decisions for equality and liberty came today -- the day after a horrendously bad decision was made by this same court.

Yesterday, the Supreme Court struck down a major part of the Voting Rights Act of 1965. It's the part that determines which states must get federal permission before changing their voting laws. It applies to the states that have a long, ugly history of discriminating against minorities, making it difficult if not impossible for them to exercise their right to vote.
LBJ signs the Voting Rights Act of 1965

The Voting Rights Act requires 9 states with a rich history of discrimination, mostly in the South, to get approval from the Justice Department before changing their voting laws. Ironically, the law was renewed several times, including in 2006, when it passed the US Senate 98-0!

It was used to block over 1,000 changes to voting laws from 1982 to 2006.  Last year, it was invoked to stop an unnecessary voter identification law in Texas as well as a Florida law that would have eliminated early voting days in minority areas.

Last year's antics, including so many voter suppression laws put into effect, so many early voting days cut, and so many hours cut, clearly show that the law is still needed.

Rightwingers are thrilled that the Voting Rights Act has had an integral part struck down. But eliminating it may work against them. Remember, in 2012, all the attempts to stifle voter participation from non-white Americans resulted in a backlash, and record-breaking numbers of black voters stood in line for as many hours as it took to take advantage of their right to vote.

I hope states that believe they have a green light to institute more voter suppression laws suffer the same consequence.


Friday, June 21, 2013

Republican Jackass of the Week

Fox Teleprompter reader Sean Hannity.

This is too easy. This guy's not the brightest bulb on Rupert's set, and that includes the recently rehired Quitter Sarah Palin.

Nonetheless, Sean gets the honors this week for being such a partisan hack and hypocrite.

Remember way back during the Dubya administration, when President Cheney and his puppet Dubya were asleep at the wheel and presided over the biggest security failure and biggest terrorist attack in American history? Right after that, those two pushed for the so-called Patriot Act, which allowed the NSA (National Security Agency) to data-mine your emails, phone calls, etc., all without a warrant from the FISA court.

Little Sean the American Patriot was all for it, waving flags and exclaiming how giving up a little privacy was the patriotic thing to do, and it would keep us safe, and blah blah blah.

Now that the Obama administration is doing the same thing, but legally, with court approval, why, it's an unamerican breach of your privacy!

I told you this was too easy. Watch the amusing yet very short clip below to see the before and after attitudes on NSA data mining from hypocritical Sean, our Republican Jackass of the Week.

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Regressives Still Obsessed with Abortion

Put away the bourbon and do something useful.
They're at it again.

The party that lost seats in the House and Senate, and lost the White House in a second electoral vote mandate -- and continues losing young voters as well as women, Hispanics, the LGBT community and blacks -- is back at it, doing what they do best: putting on an expensive show for their far rightwing Teabagger base, and alienating everyone else.

They are, yet again, trying to change American abortion law by making it illegal to have an abortion after the first 20 weeks. This is about the time that women discover if there's going to be a problem with the fetus, or if it'll put the woman's life in danger. In addition, experts have long concluded that the age of viability is about 24 weeks. That aside, the point of this theatrical show is to pretend that they're going to take away, inch by inch, American women's reproductive privacy rights. Make the cutoff point 20 weeks now, 18 weeks next time.

Oh, and exceptions for rape, incest and health problems are not included.

Of course this House bill is going nowhere. This nonsense will be ignored by the Senate. And even if it were taken up by the Senate, and somehow magically passed, it would never be signed by the President.

This is all about fundraising and humoring the far rightwing base of the Republican party. And unfortunately, it's a total waste of what little time the House actually shows up for work -- and costs taxpayers millions of dollars.

It's as useless and expensive as pretending to repeal Obamacare, the Affordable Care Act, 37 times.

Remember, this is the party that loudly proclaimed that if they got the majority in the House in 2010, their number one priority would be "jobs, jobs, jobs!"

But so far Drunken John Boner has not put forth one jobs bill. They're too busy working on blatantly unconstitutional bills like banning abortion and repealing Obamacare -- both of which have been established as legal and Constitutional by the US Supreme Court.


Friday, June 14, 2013

Republican Jackass of the Week

Trent Franks
They just can't stop.

They can't stop making idiotic statements about rape.

This time it's Trent Franks, a little-known Regressive republican from Arizona.

Another genius who apparently failed his required 9th grade high school biology class.

Todd Akin
Remember Regressive republican Todd Akin of Missouri, who famously claimed that women can't possibly get pregnant from "legitimate rape," since the female body has the ability to "shut that whole thing down"?

Richard Mourdock
Remember Indiana senate candidate and Regressive republican Richard Mourdock who famously claimed that if a woman got pregnant from rape, "god intended it to happen"?

Remember that Willard Romney's Regressive republican party specifically put a plank in its official platform, proclaiming that his party is against all abortions, with no exception whatsoever for rape or incest?

Well now we have another gem to add to the War on Women Collection of Stupid Statements from arrogant, ignorant Regressive republican men:

During a House Judiciary hearing on his anti-abortion bill, Trent Franks stated that he opposes an exemption for rape victims because, "the incidence of rape resulting in pregnancy is very low." This is why he's seeking to pass a bill banning abortions after 20 weeks.

See? Apparently you really can't get pregnant from rape. Or almost never can.

This bill is not going to become law. Not gonna happen.

(a) It will never pass the Senate.
(b) President Obama will never sign it.
(c) There's the little matter of it being unconstitutional.

(And for the record, 95% of all abortions happen in the first trimester, which means within the first 12 weeks.)

Another typical Regressive republican middle-aged man who is obsessed with control over American women. Another Republican who can't keep his mouth shut about rape, a subject they know nothing about. Another Republican Jackass of the Week.

I guess Stephen Colbert is going to have to reset his counter.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

New Cheerios Ad for the Haters

Here's the original ad for Cheerios that got some far rightwing Klan types to soil themselves:



And now a brand new spoof -- just for the haters -- that answers it:


Friday, June 7, 2013

Republican Jackass of the Week

Donald Rumsfeld.

Remember him? Of course you do.

He was President Bush's Secretary of Defense. He's the guy who got every single thing wrong about the Iraq War, beginning with starting it, how long it would take, how it would "pay for itself," how we'd be greeted as liberators, and every other aspect of it.  During his and Dubya's watch, the US suffered the biggest security failure in American history, with the worst terrorist attacks and 3,000 people killed on 9/11.

Remember how he claimed he knew exactly where the non-existent weapons of mass destruction were?

"We know where they are. They're in Tikrit and Baghdad, and east, west, south and north."

That narrows it right down.

Remember how he replied to the complaints about sending US troops to war without adequate body armor?

"You go to war with the army you have, not the army you might want or wish to have."

And the circular classic:

"There are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns; the things we don't know we don't know."

When this total failure was asked at a recent rightwing interview, by a member of the audience, whether President Obama has actually switched sides in the war on terror, he replied, "I don't feel competent to answer. I don't know."

You're not sure if the President of the United States is on the terrorists' side, you Jackass?

Say something like that during the Bush years and you'd be called anti-American, unpatriotic, and treasonous.

Need I point out that President Obama was the one who actually got Osama Bin Laden, at which Rummy and Dubya failed for eight years? Should I mention that al Qaeda's leadership has been devastated under the current President? And despite all the obsession about Beghazi, it was the only attack of its kind during President Obama's first five years -- compared to 13 similar attacks under Bush?

Nah. No need. We'll just label Donald Rumsfeld the Jackass that he is, and move on.

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Republican Jackass of the Week Part 1

We have two this week.

First, it's Georgia's Republican Senator Saxby Chambliss.

While sexual assaults in the military are currently at staggering levels, this guy shrugs it off and runs to the old "boys will be boys" excuse.

Says Saxby: "The young folks coming into each of your services, are anywhere from 17 to 22. Gee whiz, the hormone level created by nature sets in place the possibility for these types of things to occur." That's actually what he said, into a mic, for the world to hear, in front of cameras and other magical recording devices, to top military officials at a Senate Armed Services Committee.

See? Don't think of it as a violent criminal assault.

Think of it as just a bunch of guys responding to hormones.

Gee whiz.

Except, of course, the officer in charge of the Air Force's sexual prevention program who was arrested for assault is 41. And the manager of the sexual harassment and assault response program in Fort Campbell, Kentucky, recently arrested for a domestic assault, is 42.

Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel has called military sexual assaults "a scourge," and promised to make addressing them a top priority. A recent Pentagon report estimated as many as 26,000 service members may have been assaulted in 2012.

But hey, brush it off as "hormones."

You're a Jackass. Our Republican Jackass of the Week, Part One. The certificate's in the mail.

Tomorrow it's the regularly scheduled Friday Jackass of the Week.



Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Republicans: "closed-minded, racist, rigid, old-fashioned"

That's according to the College Republican National Committee's own latest survey, or autopsy, explaining the Regressive Party's failure to attract younger voters last November.

It was a 95-page report that combined a series of surveys and focus groups that were taken before as well as after the Presidential election six months ago.  The survey, which compiled responses from young Republicans 30 years of age and under, showed that "rich" and "religious" are two words that best describe the party; "open minded, caring, cooperative" were the words that least describe it.

When asked who comes to mind as a leader in the party, the top responses were Rush Limbaugh, Glen Beck and Bill O'Reilly -- rightwing media blowhards, and not a legislator among them.

The steady stream of outrageous statements and polarizing rhetoric that came from one Republican candidate after another last year led to those under 30 describing that party as "closed-minded, racist, rigid and old-fashioned."

The bottom line shows that if the Regressive republican party is going to ever attract younger voters again, it's going to have to change its stance on most issues.

It needs to stop attacking teachers, cops and firemen and labeling them "thugs" as was the case every day and every night on Fox last year when Republican governors cut so many of their jobs, leading to huge demonstrations, mainly in Wisconsin.

It needs to stop being the party of "legitimate rape," a phrase uttered by one Todd Aiken who claimed that if a woman is "legitimately raped," she can't get pregnant because "the female body has ways of shutting that whole thing down."

Another Regressive, Richard Murdock, who ran for US Senate in Indiana last year, described a pregnancy resulting from rape as "something god intended."

Virginia's Regressive republican governor, Bob McDonnell, known as Governor Forced Ultrasound, or "Trans-Vaginal Bob", actually signed a bill requiring medically unnecessary, invasive ultrasounds to be forced on women -- at their expense -- before being allowed to have a legal, Constitutional abortion.

The Republican platform itself, adopted at Willard Romney's convention, stated that the party was against all abortions, with no exception for incest or rape.

After all of this, anytime a Regressive was asked about their party's War on Women, they'd put on the confused face and ask, "what war on women? Why, whatever do you mean?"

Perhaps if Regressives were serious about attracting women voters, they'd disband their Legitimate Rape Caucus and stop the attacks on women's reproductive health.

Maybe they should also drop their rabid opposition to marriage equality, which is embraced in overwhelming numbers with those under 30.

Their own presidential candidate, Willard Romney, expressed vile contempt for half the country during a candle-lit fundraiser for the wealthy in Boca Raton, when he thought no one was recording his comments. Referring to 47% of Americans as a bunch of deadbeats who won't take responsibility for themselves is not the way to win friends and influence people -- or get them to vote for you.

Making life so miserable for undocumented Hispanics in hopes that they "self-deport" is not the way to attract Hispanics.

Maybe Regressive governors in dozens of states should stop shortening early voting hours and cutting early voting days in hopes of suppressing "the wrong people from voting."

If the Republican party wants to stop being referred to as The Regressive Party, perhaps it should immediately stop being overtly hostile toward women, gays, Hispanics, blacks and young people.

Louisiana's Governor, Piyush Jindal even told his party point blank: stop being the stupid party.

That means stop denying science and math and embracing superstition.

Will they change their attitude and public image to keep from going extinct, based on the results of their own survey? Probably not, since they haven't changed a thing since their last autopsy right after the election. And not changing will mean people under 30 will continue to stay away in droves from the party they see as being represented by Mr. Burns from The Simpsons.